Breakfast Casserole: Wake up lazybones!

True fact: breakfast is the most complicated meal to order at a restaurant.

Why? Think about it. How do YOU order your breakfast?

(If you say scrambled eggs and toast,then I rescind my accusation. Towards you. Only.)

Every single person wants eggs a different way. Poached, but not-too-hard. Or not-too-runny. Eggs over "medium," whatever that means. White gravy but wheat toast. No melon in my fruit cup. "Crispy" bacon, but I want it out in five minutes. Because that's completely plausible.

(No it isn't.)

My four-year old daughter even has the audacity to order pancakes but "with no flip." Whatever that means.

It's ok. Restaurant people are used to your crazy, contradictory breakfast orders. They even expect it. But keep that in mind, when you're sitting down at a table for 12 on Mother's Day. Look around you: all those other people are their ordering insanely difficult breakfasts, as well.

I wish I could make more casseroles. They are so easy.

But my family won't eat them. No how, no way.

I didn't realize I was living in a family of food separatists, but apparently, that's the case.

This breakfast casserole I made my for my law school study group one Sunday morning, because that's how you study in law school. Every. Single. Day. Mostly I made a casserole because I didn't feel like whipping out my griddle and using 20 different pans and bowls to make breakfast.

Also, no one can special order anything about a casserole. It's either eaten, or it isn't. 

And we have civil procedure to study, so why waste time on an argument over sausage patties v. sausage links?

Thankfully, my study peeps enjoyed this, and no complaints. So here it is, in all of its "I don't care what you wanted for breakfast we're having this casserole" glory.

Breakfast Casserole

1/3 loaf of french bread, cubed

1/2 cup heavy whipping cream mixed with 1/4 cup milk

1 package sausage links, cooked according to instructions and chopped OR about 1 cup crumbled bacon or cooked ground sausage 

1 package shredded cheese

7-8 large eggs

1/4 cup chopped green onions

Optional sauteed vegetables: red bell peppers, chopped onions, mushrooms 

Salt & Pepper

Heat oven to 375. In a pan-sprayed baking pan, lay out an even layer of french bread. Add the sausage links, green onions (and other veggies, if using) and cover with half of the shredded cheese. In a mixing bowl, whisk the eggs with the cream/milk until well incorporated. Salt and pepper the eggs, then pour over  egg mix into the bread and sausage pan. Finish with another topping of cheese. Bake for 30 minutes, or until eggs are cooked and fluffy. Allow to rest for 5-7 minutes before slicing.

Preschool Valentine Krispy Pops

"You choo-choo-choose me???"

~Ralph, The Simpsons

You know what is the best part about making treats for your kid's preschool class?

Blaming your ugly misshapen treats on your kid.

It really works.

Look at that crazy mess of candy meltaways. All over those lollipop sticks. Like a 4-year-old did it.

Or at least, helped to do it.

Except she didn't have anything to do with this fiasco. In fact, my daughter avoided helping me with this project at all costs.

Can you blame her?

It's like she instinctively knew I was going to drag her into this by proxy, sully her good name, and blame the smudges, lop-sided marshmallows and poor-Krispy-to-marshmallow-fluff ratio on her.

 

Well, she's right.

Not to say these aren't adorable. Little chocolate krispy treats dipped in candy with a giant marshmallow heart on a stick- what's not to love?

But I'd never made krispy treats before, and well, candy melts are just a mess waiting to happen.

But still cute. You may think that the crooked marshmallow placement was done by a preschooler. That, unfortunately, is not the case.

But that's exactly what I plan on telling her teacher. And the other parents at preschool.

Don't you judge me.

Guess what. Too much marshmallow fluff makes krispy treats ridiculous to deal with as a medium. They fall apart all over the place.

And forget about trying to jam a lollipop stick through them- I settled for candymelting the stick against the treat, like a wobbly, dangerously-constructed sucker.

And you've got to let them cool. At every stage. 

I can't guarantee the ones you make will look any less crazy than mine do.

But isn't that love, really?

Crazy, messy, fluffy and it gets all over the place.

And the cleanup is about the same, too.

Happy Valentines, you crazy fools!

Preschool Valentine Krispy Pops

6 cups chocolate cocoa krisps cereal (I used whole foods brand)

7 oz. marshmallow fluff (I used too much, but all other recipes call for this amount)

3 Tbsp butter

1 bag red candy meltaways 

1 bag heart-shaped marshmallows

candy lollipop sticks

parchment paper

biscuit cutter

patience

In a saucepan, melt the butter; add the fluff and mix well until the marshmallow has melted completely. Fold mix into cereal and mix well; lay the cereal into parchment-lined casserole dishes and allow to cool. 

Once cool, cut out shapes with biscuit cutter. In a microwave-safe dish, melt the meltaways according to instructions.

Lay out a dipping area and cooling area.

Dip one end of the lollipop stick into the meltaway, and press firmly into the back of each krispy treat. Allow the stick to cool completely to form a good adhesion.

One you have your treat on a stick, reheat the meltaways (I added a bit of vegetable oil to the candy melt, to make it shiny and smoother)and carefully dip the face of each treat into the candy.   Press a marshmallow heart in each center and cool the treat again on another piece of parchment paper, preferably lined on a baking sheet, so you can cool it in either the refrigerator, or, as in my case, the garage during a snowstorm. Whatever you want. Just get them really chilled before you bag em and tag em.

I heart you!

~NTS

{A disproportionate amount of} Cheese and Macaroni

9-cheese Macaroni & Cheese

It's Super Bowl Sunday, and that means something.

To somebody. Somewhere.

If that somebody is you, well, then I hope your team's beater doesn't quaffle the snitch while attempting a triple-double.

By now, you're probably thinking all I know about sports I learned from Harry Potter or an old Ice Cube song about having a most excellent day-off.

But that's not true. I'm an Okie, so I know my football.

College football, that is. 

Boomer.

I have thrown some Super Bowl shindigs in my day. The last one we hosted was the time a certain sibling of Michael Jackson exposed a certain part of her anatomy and a certain portion of the viewing public (as in, the majority of folks who live in the part of the country I do)threw an absolute hissy about what obviously was a costume-fail. 

In the spirit of that awesome half-time show, I present a Super Bowl party dish that will equally blow your pasties off. Or at least maybe expose them when you weren't ready. Whatever. 

9-Cheese Baked Macaroni & Cheese

Note to you: I realize that most people don't have 9 types of cheese just sitting around, like I do. In observance of full disclosure, 5 of the cheeses were from some 5-blend shredded bag o' cheese, which I just added to get crazy. Not necessary.

16 oz. of elbow macaroni, cooked and drained

10 oz. sharp white cheddar, grated 

(I used my food processor to grate all the hard cheeses)

6 oz. Poddo, or other hard white cheese

1-2 oz Gorgonzola, crumbled

8 oz. 2% Velveeta, cubed

1/2 cup 5-cheese grated cheese blend (optional)

1/4 cup of Italian breadcrumbs, mixed with 1/4 cup Panko breadcrumbs (optional)

4 cups of milk (I used 2% as well)

1 (12 oz) can fat-free evaporated milk

1/3 cup flour

1 bay leaf

Pinch each: chili powder, dried basil, paprika

Big pinch of salt and pepper

2-3 shallots, minced

3 tbsp butter

In a good-sized saucepan, melt butter on medium heat until foaming. Saute shallots for five minutes, or until tender. Add bay leaf and spices, mix well. Lower heat slightly; add flour and mix with butter to make a roux. DON'T BURN YOUR ROUX! Add the milk and evaporated milk; bring the heat up slightly and whip the roux into the milk. Allow to thicken for 10 minutes, but do not allow the milk to scorch. Fish out the bay leaf and discard. Slowly add the Velveeta, half the white cheddar and Poddo, and stir until all the cheeses have melted into the milk sauce. 

Place all the pasta into a large baking pan; pour the cheese sauce over the pasta and toss the pasta well. Top the pasta and cheese sauce with the remaining white cheddar/Poddo and the 5-cheese blend, if using. Finish with a layer of the breadcrumbs.

Bake pasta at 375 for 30 minutes, then switch the oven to broil on low heat. Toast the breadcrumbs and brown the cheese for 2 minutes. Remove from oven and allow to settle for 10 minutes before serving.

Try to keep all your unmentionables in place and be sure to warn guests ahead of time, to avoid your own half-time fiasco.

PS: Sooner!